Article written by Teodora Vlad.
A simple search for "How to be happy" leads us to a significant number of pages offering lists of practical advice. “Smile more,” “practice gratitude,” “meditate” might initially seem like valid techniques. However, can they truly be considered a recipe for success, as often claimed? Or are we facing yet another iteration, lacking scientific grounding, of the classic adage “if you want to be happy, just be”? This article invites you to explore the notion of toxic positivity that has permeated the online world.
What is toxic positivity?
The trend of toxic positivity is rooted in perpetuating a positive mentality in all life contexts while suppressing any negativity or stress-inducing thoughts (Upadhyay et al., 2022). Essentially, a person who follows this trend:
– denies their negative emotions or thoughts when they appear;
– avoids reflecting on events that cause them stress;
– creates an “artificial” happiness and doesn’t allow themselves to experience any emotion outside a positive framework.
Currently, toxic positivity seems to be gaining traction online, especially through social media. Various trends and hashtags (e.g., #positivevibesonly), promoted by influential figures, create idealized and unrealistic standards for a happy life. This process can increase individual pressure to build a so-called “perfect life” (Wyatt, n.d.). Thus, instead of experiencing the sought-after happiness, we may find ourselves drifting further from it.
How Does Toxic Positivity Affect Us?
The promotion of positive practices has both a light side and a dark side. If you're doing something you genuinely enjoy and feel real joy, then what’s wrong with being positive?! If the positive emotions are authentic, fostering positivity can benefit one’s well-being and mental health (Pluhařová, n.d.). However, issues arise when there’s pressure to maintain a lifestyle that isn’t truly yours. In the long run, the trend of toxic positivity may intensify emotional distress, as the “happiness obsession,” as some authors call it, leaves no room for acknowledging or processing negative emotions (Wyatt, n.d.).
How to Combat This Trend?
Fighting against toxic positivity doesn’t mean avoiding positive emotions. Instead, it’s important to give sufficient space to all the emotions we experience. Don’t stop looking for positive aspects in your experiences. Don’t stop expressing gratitude for what happens in your life. However, remember that negative emotions are also emotions. Hiding them away in one of the most distant rooms of our minds doesn’t mean we’ve dealt with them effectively or that we’re truly thinking positively. Allow space for negative emotions, sit with them for a while, and try to understand what thoughts or situations triggered them. Restructure negative thoughts in a healthy way, without pressuring yourself to have a “perfect life.” After all, what exactly is perfection?
What Should We Take Away from This Article?
The belief that a positive attitude is the only way to solve our problems and that negative emotions have no place in our lives is a trap. Happiness doesn’t arrive “on demand,” nor is it the only valid state. All the other emotions we experience on the road to happiness have their own role and deserve to be acknowledged, analyzed, and managed. Even though the internet sometimes seems to forbid us from being sad, remember that negative emotions have their own purpose too!
References
Recommended Resource: Folk, D., & Dunn, E. (2023). A systematic review of the strength of evidence for the most commonly recommended happiness strategies in mainstream media. Nature Human Behaviour, 7(10), 1697-1707. https://doi.org/10.1038/s41562-023-01651-4
Pluhařová, J., De Sousa, V., Strömsdörfer, S., & Schraube, E. In Defence of “Toxic Positivity”: Shedding Light On. Accesat la 18.10.2024: https://rucforsk.ruc.dk/ws/files/96034349/in_defense_of_toxic_positivity__shedding_light_on_a_misunderstood_phenomena.pdf
Upadhyay, I. S., Srivatsa, K. A., & Mamidi, R. (2022, July). Towards toxic positivity detection. In Proceedings of the tenth international workshop on natural language processing for social media (pp. 75-82). doi: 10.18653/v1/2022.socialnlp-1.7
Wyatt, Z. (f.a.). The Dark Side of# PositiveVibes: Understanding Toxic Positivity in Modern Culture. Psychiatry. Accesat la 18.10.2024: https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Zoe-Wyatt/publication/383871051_The_Dark_Side_of_PositiveVibes_Understanding_Toxic_Positivity_in_Modern_Culture/links/66ded25eb1606e24c21b2c67/The-Dark-Side-of-PositiveVibes-Understanding-Toxic-Positivity-in-Modern-Culture.pdf